A Whole New Forum for a Whole New Life

Well I am so new to blogging but here it goes. As time goes on I will get better at just writing the happenings of my life and my feelings as I go through my journey. I guess I should start out by telling my story. In August of 2009, I became very ill while on vacation in Cleveland, Ohio visiting my beloved cousins. I went on an outing to the Feast of the Assumption, a large Italian festival held in the summer every year in the Little Italy district. It was hot and I weighed over 300 pounds. (and I say over 300 because a regular home scale doesn't go over 300 pounds so I am not sure exactly how much over I really was!) Anyhow, I remember walking with the procession through Little Italy and walking for about 3 miles or more for the course of the day while enjoying the festival. No easy feat for someone who lead a VERY sedentary life. After the festival my cousin and I headed back to the east side burbs of Cleveland and I noticed that my feet and ankles were swollen to the point of my skin being stretched tight which wasn't particularly something new to me but seeing them turn a horrid shade of purple was. I first thought I might have deep vein thrombosis from my flight, but since the flight from Kansas City to Cleveland is only 2 hours that was highly unlikely. I was scared that something was really wrong with me and even more upsetting to me was the fact that I was on vacation and away from home to deal with this. I went to the emergency room at a satellite facility of the Cleveland Clinic and the doctor i saw told me I was too young to be experiencing these types of health issues. I had a bad case of cellulitis and my blood pressure was ridiculous- (the top number was 200). I ended up being able to take a prescription diuretic and antibiotics and was sent on my way. I was so upset by the whole ordeal that I decided at that it was time to do something about my weight or else I was going to die. I will never forget the look on my cousin's face as he looked at me lying in the ER, it scared me straight so to speak. I went on to enjoy the remainder of my vacation and I am so glad I did. I didn't know it then, but it would be the last time I would see my oldest beloved cousin John. He passed away in January 2010. He cheered me on as I was in the beginning stages of my weight loss journey but sadly he didn't get to see me succeed or come as far as I have. The beginning of 2010 would throw me and my efforts quite a lot of curveballs. First the death of my dear cousin and a subsequent trip to Ohio for his funeral. I drove there this time and had never driven on a long distance trip ever in my life but did very well and I maintained my plan while on the trip. After returning from Ohio this time I had to move from my apartment in the inter-city unexpectedly and move to the suburb where my job is located. Best move I have ever made but all the same it was winter time, moving with only my mother to help me, and thankfully at the end my best friend and her son were able to help me finish it. I also had a very close friendship end with a co-worker and I just remember what a devastating time it was in my life. But somewhere I found the drive to keep going and if I hadn't already began to take weight off in early September 2009 I would not have been able to move myself physically to my current residence. That move took me 8 days to finish. It was the worst time of my recent life.

Anyhow back to 2009, upon return to Kansas City from my vacation, I joined Weight Watchers. I knew of another cousin here in town that had done that and she had great success with it and I wanted to give it a try. I began to feel better almost immediately. I followed the program, counted my POINTS, and eventually began walking. This was big because I sat 8+ hours a day at my job, I sat to drive the distance to and from my job and I lived in the inter-city where walking or anything outside could be life threatening. I started going to the park next to where I work that is in a safe area of town and then when I would get out of work late, I would walk in the parking lot where it was well lit and monitored by security. I would walk up and down stairs in the building where I work on my breaks when the weather was bad outside and I continued to do this 3-4 days a week sometimes more. When I lost my first 30 pounds I felt so good that I decided I was bored with walking and I needed a change up so I started going to the local community center pool and I got brave and went back to the only athletic thing I ever did as a kid and that was roller skating. My co-workers were appalled at first because they were concerned I would get injured roller skating. Thankfully I was very good at it as a kid and it stuck with me.

In February 2010 I participated in my very first 5k walk known as the Groundhog 5k. I signed up at work to participate and I went and had a lot of fun. I was dead last to cross the finish line but I did it and I was so happy with that! I was overcome with emotion as I would be many times over at each walk I have participated in since. I thought to myself at that moment, if someone had told me a year before that I would walk in a 5k race and be losing weight I would have thought they were crazy but there I was. I continue to sign up for every race my place of employment sponsors and now its about how fast I can finish as opposed to just finishing and its the most awesome feeling! I have had a good friend and one co-worker each participate in one of the last two races for the very first time and they would be doing one of these events for the very first time. It was so exciting for me to see them finish and I can only hope that the experience brought something to them that I had experienced only one short year prior.

Also in February 2010 I met a new friend who would teach me some valuable lessons that helped motivate me. One day were were texting over the phone and he sent me a picture of a model who I had never heard of or seen before. Her name is London Andrews. She does a lot of different modeling including nude modeling but what is different about her is that she is 5'5 and weighs 180 lbs and is very similar in body style to me and for the first time in my life I was able to identify with a realistic person who was absolutely beautiful and sexy and it made me realize- "Hey! I can look like that too" because her look IS so realistic. I wrote her a letter in September of 2010 and she posted it on her blog. I let her know what an inspiration she was to me and how just her image of self confidence and beauty helped me to realize that you don't have to be a "Pam Anderson type" to be considered beautiful or sexy. This was a large turning point in my journey of weight loss. Thank you London and of course to my friend without whom I would never have known who she was.

Over the next year I would hit two big plateaus that almost derailed my current success. When I hit 260 pounds I could not get past that point for over a month no matter what I did. But finally I moved past it and then I hit the next show stopping plateau at 240. In November of 2010 when I weighed in the 240's I decided to join Jazzercise. I wanted to at least try it because I had seen a group of Jazzercisers at two of the 5k walks I had recently participated in and they led a pre-walk warm up for both events. It was fun and it looked like fun. I am a dancer at heart, I have a strong dance background from the time I was a young girl until I was a pre-teen. A love I still have in my heart today. So, I bit the bullet and went to a class and now I can't stay away. I have had more results with Jazzercise and my continued walking and Weight Watchers all together. Currently they are doing an extra specialty class called Ballet Body that I absolutely LOVE it combines my love of dance and the strength training and conditioning of Jazzercise. In late February 2011 I took my physical activity to another level and added in boxing to my exercise schedule. I am an avid follower of The Biggest Loser. It is SO inspirational and motivating to see these people go through their struggle on national television and being to identify with their emotional and physical experience. This season the contestants have done a tremendous amount of boxing with the new trainers on the show. And the numbers on the scale reflect the impact that the boxing has. I hooked up with an old friend that I knew from my "band days" ( another long story for another night) and he is a personal trainer for a gym here in town. His girlfriend is a professional boxer and a personal trainer at the same gym. I sent him a message when I had seen a post he put out for a boxing fitness class that they would be teaching/leading and asked him if he thought this would be something I could do considering my size and still limited physical capability. He said the class was geared to all fitness levels. So I went and I will tell you the first class I was a nervous wreck because there were men in the class, many athletic fit types and then there was me but I went ahead and now I love it. It still taxes me to my limit of what I can do but I feel so awesome after that its worth it. So, now I currently weigh 216 pounds. I am dedicated to my health, my weight loss and my personal happiness. I have a fantastic new job I started in October 2010 that continues to be an adventure every night and it has provided me the opportunity to join the gym, join Jazzercise and participate in this boxing class. So through this blog, I hope to share my continuing journey of my weight loss, my emotional struggles with my family (another long story for another day) and my hopes and dreams of a whole new future to look ahead to because all roads I take from here really do lead there. I hope you will enjoy following me here as much as I will enjoy writing. Its late and I do have to get some work done!